Recently someone very near and dear to me has been struggling with a dilemma. This person found themselves in a relationship with a 'Jekyall and Hyde' character. The Dr Jekyall side met all their emotional needs and they lived through the Mr Hyde times so that they could enjoy the Dr Jekyall periods. When we meet someone who meets all of our emotional needs we unconsciously and consciously choose to stay with that person.
Apart from the emotional pain of living with a Mr Hyde at times, it can also cause physical issues. This sort of dilemma causes stress and as you and I already know, this produces stress hormones which can lead to weight gain. But this kind of stress can also cause digestive upsets, headaches and migraines, skin problems, lack of sleep (which can also lead to weight gain) and even depression.
Whilst all our emotional needs may be being met intermittantly, our values are not being realised. We all have many unconscious and conscious values, and our top three values need to be realised at all times for us to be able to live comfortably and happily on a daily basis. Maybe you have worked for an organisation that did not share your values and you felt uncomfortable having to practice their values during the day. I am guessing that in the end you left because it was too uncomfortable and you probably found yourself becoming increasingly tired and unwell, dreading going into work every day.
What are your top three values? How do you work them out?
Write a list of the things that you talk about the most and spend most time and money on. You may tell people that you value fitness but rarely undertake any physical exercise or spend time and money on exercise. My top value is my family. I talk about them, think about them, spend time and money on them, plan my working life around them and do all that I can to help them remain happy and healthy.
This week I was coaching someone on their values and once they understood their top three, everything feel into place for them.
Enjoy discovering and living your values.
warmest wishes
Sarah
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